I'm still alive!

I haven't posted in a while. I've just been doing other things lately.

Weightloss: Crap. I may be close to a plateau. I lost a single pound this week. On the bright side I lost a total of 16 lbs this summer, but I was kind of hoping not to slow down on my weight loss before I leave for my trip to Minnesotta. Dang.

An observation: I must be the must a boring friend. I called a bunch of my friends today, and not a single one of them answered. I hadn't seen these friends in a while and I was thinking it would be nice to hang out again, but nothing. Some of their phones were even off, which means they were doing something. Meaning I had another day at home alone. My friends tell me the plans I make are too extreme or too boring. I have no middle ground. I really need to get out of the house. Can school start please?

NOT THE GUMDROP BUTTONS!!!

Random fact of the year: Men can lactate. There was a video of it on Tosh.0 and I'm scarred for life. Thanks to man lactation (Mantation), I'm going to have to answer the age old question with an astounding; "YES. Apprently, we do got milk." Who'd a thought?

Weight loss: I lost another two pounds this week and I'm happy. I did it mostly with dieting because I've been too lazy to go running. It's nice to know, though, that running it totally an option for me and taking a break hasn't affected my weightloss one bit. It's actually kind of weird.

The confusion: My priest said to me the other day, and quite randomly so, that I should consider what it is that God is asking me to do with my life. People live there whole lives trying to figure out their purpose and my priest says to me, "I think it's time you looked into that more. He might be calling you to something."

First of all, I'm now confused as to what my priest knows that God hasn't told me. Second, it's really weird that he should have asked me this question when a few days before I find myself considering the same question. Twilight zone? It just may be.

Conversations worth while

I've noticed that I talk too much. I really do. I don't know when it happened, I don't know why, but all of a sudden I can't help but speak.

When I was younger I spoke much less the I do now, and I was happier for it. People listened to me and typically if I said anything at all it was worth listening too. I wish I could still say that of myself now, though. I still maintain my deep admiration for those who recognize the value of silence but I am no longer able to replicate it. I have been constantly surrounded by people who enjoy a pleasant conversation and to sit and shoot the breaze, and being around these people has made me similar in my approach to conversation. But there was a time when I would honestly enjoy just being around someone and not even bother with words. There presence was enough.

I guess it's just something else to work on. I'm really looking at myself hard lately and trying to fix too many things, but won't it be something when I get where I'm going?

Stay offa My Facebook...

I'm dropping myself off of Facebook and Twitter for the rest of the summer. It sucks, because I'm staying off of it for the rest of the summer and I'm seeing how different things are.

How sad is it that my life changes from not being on social media? It corrupts our thoughts, for sure. I'm still facing demons, and it's not until I've stopped convincing myself I'm not alone via Facebook that I realized that...I'm alone. It's what I asked for. It's just not a mindset I was prepared to be in yet, but I guess I arrived early. Autonomy. Self sufficiency. I'm moving closer to it every day. It's a necessary part of my plans to go away and set up a new life.

When I get back to Facebook and Twitter I'm doing some serious friend/follower cleaning. People I don't need to be friends with or who I don't even know have got to be dropped. I kind of started right before I signed off, but I'm going to finish the job when I get back. People who start drama are gone, as well as people that I have to pretend to like. It's just time to get my digital life straightened out.

I wish that there was a way to block social media sites at certain times of the day to limit our access. I could get so much more done that way if only I could limit myself. Imagine a program that only lets you get online for an hour a day. Like, say, between 6:00 and 7:00? Send a tweet, update your status, gawk at your old High Schools pictures and wonder when she turned into such a slut, take bets on how long new relationships will last, and then get forced off right at 7:00. Sounds perfect to me.

Am I the only guy to have a thing for his dental hygienist?

My day: I went to the dentists office today and got the young, attractive dental hygienist again. I don't know how I always end up with the young ones when half the time the place is run by old ladies. I'm not complaining, I'm just saying. Unfortunately she was also a little forceful, being very proactive in making me uncomfortable and bleed. "Oops, did I get you?" was a common phrase uttered in my 45 minute visit there. I didn't respond but I wanted to say, "No, I always bleed randomly from my gums like that. You don't think that's a problem, do you?"

I also was planning on going to San Marcos today because I thought some friends of mine were going to watch Harry Potter in preperation for the final movie coming out. Turns out they decided to watch it a few days ago and forgot to mention it to me. Funny how that happens.

Weight Loss: I weighed in a day early because I thought I'd be in Collegeville tomorrow, and it turns out that I have lost two more pounds! That brings my total weight loss to fourteen pounds for the summer. Not bad, if I do say so myself. Funny how I always convince myself I've gained and I always end up losing.

People who lose weight are always excited about losing pounds. They, like me, exclaim it. I wonder if they do that in Britain and if it ever causes confusion, considering a pound is also their form of currency. I have to find a British person and ask...

I promised to have today's list be about innappropriate times to say "I've mastered it", but after I took out the really hilarious yet inappropriate ones, I was left with two, so no list today.

Tomorrow's forecast: What I would say if my future child asked where babies came from.

She offered to make me a sandwich. I proposed. Simple as that.

Slurpee day: Just discovered something exciting! Weight loss doesn't mean I have to give up slurpee day! Turns out that a small slurpee only has 60 calories in most flavors so next semester's slurpee days are still a go! I even went and had a slurpee today because they were free for 7/11/11. It was so good to have one of those again! I feel like I've been seriously missing those.

Weight Loss: My weigh in is coming up in a couple of days and I'm not so sure about this one. I know I haven't been for the past couple of days, but I've taken a risk and started taking in a few more calories. I feel like I was way under what I should have been consuming in a day, so hopefully this doesn't hurt me in my efforts. And no run/walk today, either. A couple of friends from San Marcos randomly decided to show up at my door step so I really didn't have an option. It was good to see my friends, though. I have to say that my friends are amazing and I'm so lucky to have them, even if they do make me fat.

Now, as promised, a list of things I will say to athiests in the afterlife.

* Told you. (This is tops of everyone's list)

* Waking up early for Sunday morning church doesn't seem so silly now, does it?

* What, does this really surprise you? Bruce Lee kicking Chuck Norris' butt was a surprise. We told you about this one.

* "Yeah, God's real. He's everywhere. You can't hide yo kids, hide yo wife, or yo husbands cause He's blessing errbody out there." -Antoine interjecting during legitimate discussion with recently deceased atheist.

* A two-year old's attempt at coloring inside the lines of a coloring book is more accurate then the History Channel's depiction of God. Don't worry, he's not that bad. Come on! Let's go meet Him! He has donuts and coffee. It's just like at church!

* "I'm sorry, athiests check in at the motel right there by the gate. Bazinga! Just kidding!" -St. Peter

* Don't worry, we won't treat you any differently here for having disbelieved in your lifetime. However, you will be rooming with Ahmed Best, the voice actor for Jar Jar Binks. Sorry.

* We disagreed on political and religious levels during your lifetime. Can we at least admit that Harry Potter would have rocked out loud with an eighties montage?


Okay, that's all of them. I'm slowly getting back into my usual train of thought for these but, to be honest, it's hard to write these and stay appropriate. I have a million more but they'd offend half of China, all of America, Montreal, midgets, and Sarah Palin. I decided it would be best to keep these to myself. Sorry, Sarah.

Tomorrow's forecast: Bad times to shout the phrase, "I've mastered it!"

And then I found a fairy. Her name was Helga and she smelled of a hangover and formaldehyde.

Here are some updates on the things I've been doing.

Guitar: Okay, so I've been bad and hardly played guitar at all! I've wanted to play so bad but I've been so busy with other things. Honestly, I just don't want to play my instruments around my family. When I play music I'd like to pretend I'm in my own little world, but if my parents are home they insist on commenting on my playing. I get that they are trying to be nice and compliment their child, but honestly I'd appreciate it more if my family just pretended they didn't hear anything. Another part of me that likes to live as if I'm living alone, even when I'm with others. I could sit in my room all day and do nothing and still feel like I have had a good day, and my parents haven't really adjusted to that yet.

Weight loss: Big update here. I have no idea what I'm doing right now. I know that in order to lose weight you don't want to eat too few calories and you don't want to eat too many as well. I don't know, however, how many calories are too few! I think right now I'd be losing weight faster if I actually new this number because my body is going into preservation mode and holding on to the calories I'm eating. I'm planning and talking to my doctor this week about a bunch of stuff to help me be a little bit more efficient. Wouldn't it be something if in order to lose weight I had to eat MORE?! I've always been unconventional about pretty much every task I've ever undertaken, so I don't see why this one should be any different. Way less, eat more! The American Dream!

Family: My little brother jokes around too much. I try and talk to him like a human being and instead of responding with a serious comment, he'll make some sarcastic remark or some stupid joke and I can't get through. There are times when I'd actually like to talk to him as if we are both above the age of seven but it just hasn't happened this summer.

My mom is WAY too clingy! Oh my gosh, it's ridiculous! I go upstairs for any reason at all and it's "where are you going?" I can't go anywhere without being asked "where are you going?" This does not bode well with someone who'd prefer to live alone if they had the option. Nor does the talking during my show (I only have ONE show, and still people talk to me during it), when I have my head phones in and I'm working or watching youtube when I just spent 30 minutes trying to talk to you and I gave up, or...AH!!! I'm not saying I don't want to talk to my mom. I'm saying I don't get why she has to know everywhere I'm going when I'm in the house or why she chooses to talk to me when I'm doing something and not the other 18 hours I'm awake and sitting around doing nothing.

And apparently my dad has been trying to talk to me lately. We've never talked much, and honestly I had no idea he was trying to talk to me. I still wouldn't know if my mom hadn't of pulled me aside and told me. I think it'd be cool to actually talk to him, but I just don't see why he'd wait until I'm in what will probably be my last year at home to try and start communicating with me. I love my dad, but we've just not really ever been able to talk. Like, ever. Ironic, with me being a Communication Studies major, too, but it's not unheard of. One of the greatest Communication scholars of all time, C.S. Lewis and his father (a respected Communication
Scholar himself) NEVER spoke. They would constantly argue and yell and fight and so they just didn't speak near the end of their life. Studying communication doesn't make you a better communicator, it just lets you know what you did wrong in hindsight.


Random: I've decided that on top of my weight loss journaling, I shall return to the original intent of the blog. To be random. Back in High School I had a notebook that was filled with random thoughts and ideas and were all in list form. It was vastly innappropriate, very random, and strangely awesome. I may never get this blog up to the epic state of that notebook, but gosh darn it I'm going to try! Oh, and I'm going to continue the weight loss and other achievements updates as well. First,

People who shouldn't teach an English class

* Any of Jerry Springers guests

* Yoda- "Before E does I come, unless E after C does it come."

* Arnold Schwarzeneger- "I DON'T KNOW WHO THEY ARE, BUT THEY WANT ME AND MY ANTECEDENTS DEAD!"

* The Hulk- "HULK HEAD HURT! WHAT WORDS?"

* That singer from the band, America- "I say I'm the best teacher alive for there ain't no one for to give me no argument about it." (If you don't get the reference, listen to "A Horse with No Name".

* Professor Quirrel from Harry Potter.

* Ms. South Carolina.

* Rosie O'Donnell, because she fails at everything but eating a family size bucket of fried chicken.

* Charlie Sheen, but I'm sure his brain is on so much cocaine, or "Tiger Blood", that he couldn't even find the classroom.



Tomorrow's forecast: What I'll be saying to atheists when they die and find out God's real.